Here’s What To Talk About On A First Date (& 7 Topics To Avoid)
When I think about what to discuss on a first date, my initial reaction is often to escape.
Who really has the energy to charm a complete stranger using cliché icebreakers and cheesy pick-up lines?
Fortunately, it doesn’t have to feel that overwhelming.
Having experienced a considerable number of uncomfortable first dates, I’ve learned a few tricks that can make the experience more enjoyable.
Let’s face it. Few experiences can match the anxiety of a first date.
There’s the tension of those awkward pauses, the pressure of light conversation, and the need to continually ask questions can feel exhausting.
That’s exactly why it’s vital to determine conversation topics beforehand. It allows you to present yourself well and not appear like an interrogator.
Dating professionals concur. To ease your nerves before a first date, having a strategy is essential.
And just to clarify, I’m not suggesting that you prepare binders filled with notes. Instead, focusing on a few significant topics can assist you in assessing mutual interests.
What might these significant topics be? I’ll share all that and more here.
You’ll find a list of reliable first date conversation starters, essential first date inquiries, and 7 topics to steer clear of if you aim to have a terrific first date.
Pay careful attention to these recommendations, and soon enough, you’ll be looking forward to your second date!
Also check out: 21 Indications Of A Successful First Date & How To ROCK The Second One
First Date Conversation Topics – Your Ultimate Guide
The discussion during a first date revolves around getting to know one another and discovering if there’s chemistry.
By using these helpful tips, you’re increasing your chances for a successful first date.
Don’t overcomplicate things (you’re in the same situation)


Whenever you start to feel anxious and think about canceling, remember that your date is most likely feeling the same way.
If you worry that they won’t take to you or that they aren’t ready for a kiss at the end of the night, chances are they are having similar doubts.
So take a breather, calm your mind, and consider the bigger picture. This could be someone who becomes significant in your life. You’ve got this!
Acknowledge that you’re a bit nervous (it’ll lighten the mood)



Admitting that you feel a bit nervous can really help to ease the atmosphere. It can bring a little humor to the situation, acknowledging that both of you are feeling a tad anxious and both of you are unsure of what’s next.
No stress. The quicker you dive into conversation, the sooner you’ll find it becoming more relaxed and perhaps even enjoyable!
Follow my pointers and check out the questions listed below, and everything will turn out all right.
Keep in mind you’re there to enjoy!



Your goal is to steer clear of feeling stressed, anxious, or nervous.
You’re there to have a great time, meet a potential match, and share lots of laughs throughout the evening.
When you find yourself overthinking things, take a moment to reset, remind yourself that it’s not as consequential as you might think, and toss out a humorous question.
See also: This Is Why It’s So AWESOME To Date An Introverted Girl
Approach the situation with self-assurance and a bright outlook



Your mindset makes a huge difference. If you head into it with a pessimistic outlook and prepare for failure, you’ll miss out on the opportunity.
So, put on that smile, turn up your favorite tunes as you get ready, and get set for an exciting night filled with fun experiences. The more positive your mindset, the more enjoyable it will be.
Be aware of how your body communicates



Avoid crossing your arms, glancing around the venue, showcasing boredom, or evading eye contact. Such negative gestures can create an unfavorable impression.
Maintain a comfortable demeanor, maintain eye contact during the conversation, nod in understanding, and don’t frequently shift your gaze elsewhere. This behavior conveys your engagement in what they are saying.
Lastly, inquire with thoughtful questions (and keep them coming)


At last, we arrive at the highlight. Posing queries is your ultimate strategy to bond and initiate delightful small talk and significant dialogue. And I’ve got the answers for you!
Below, you will uncover the most effective questions to pose that will indicate to your date that you’re intelligent, enjoyable, inventive, and attentive. Go for it!
See also: 100 Profound Questions To Ask Your Date If You Truly Want To Understand Them
120 Ultimate First Date Questions That Work Wonders
Here is the only list of first date questions you might ever need. Begin with the straightforward ones and transition to the humorous and charming ones as the evening unfolds.
With these conversation starters at your disposal, you will never find yourself wondering what to discuss on a first date again.



1. What activities do you enjoy the most during your leisure time?
2. What’s your ideal career, and do you ever envision going after it?
3. What are your top five all-time favorite TV shows?
4. How do you think your best friend would depict you, and what makes you think that?
5. If you had to choose only one book to keep for life, which would you pick and why?
6. What aspirations do you have on your bucket list that you wish to achieve in your lifetime?
7. Which family member tends to irritate you the most? (And feel free to share yours!)
8. Where is your favorite spot to retreat to when you crave solitude?
9. What are your go-to activities that instantly lift your spirits?
10. How would you describe yourself during your high school years?



11. What is the longest period you have binge-watched a Netflix series, and which one was that?
12. Can you share your social media username? (Playful!)
13. Have you experienced any strange or amusing situations on Tinder? If yes, would you like to share?
14. What instantly turns you off when it comes to a partner?
15. Would you choose a coffee shop over a bar?
16. What are your thoughts on online dating platforms? Have you ever found a partner through them?
17. Do you own any pets? If yes, what type and what are their names?
18. Who’s the most intriguing person you’ve ever had the pleasure of meeting?
19. Do you lean more towards staying indoors or enjoying the outdoors?
20. List your favorite alcoholic and non-alcoholic beverages!



21. What have you been captivated by recently?
22. Is there a specific international cuisine you really enjoy, and what is it?
23. If you could select three individuals (anyone from around the globe) to accompany you to a deserted island, who would you take?
24. Do you favor mornings or nights?
25. Is there a type of food that you would decline to try under any circumstances?
26. How many siblings do you have? If you do, describe each one in three words!
27. Who is your favorite writer of all time?
28. Which movie do you consider your all-time favorite and how many times have you watched it?
29. What are you recognized for among your friends?
30. Which musical artist could you listen to endlessly without feeling bored?



31. How does your dream vacation appear?
32. Do you have any achievements you take pride in?
33. What is the most recent trend that has puzzled you?
34. What are your views on TikTok?
35. What’s the song you rely on for karaoke?
36. Can you share your most humorous and embarrassing life experiences?
37. What has been your most exciting adventure?
38. Which superpower would you like to hold for your entire lifetime?
39. What do you believe is something everyone ought to experience at least once?
40. If you were to choose one animated character for a date, who would it be?




41. What’s one thing you would never decline?
42. What are the most unusual interests you have that nobody really understands?
43. What’s the most unsettling dream you’ve experienced?
44. What’s the oddest joke you’ve come across?
45. How much time do you usually take to rise from bed in the morning?
46. What are your non-negotiables in relationships?
47. If you were a disc jockey, what would you choose as your name?
48. Do you possess any absurd fears?
49. Where’s the most bizarre location where you’ve had an intimate encounter?
50. Have you ever sent a text while inebriated, and what was the outcome?



51. Which beverage could you never fathom drinking again?
52. What is your go-to website?
53. How long have you managed to stay awake without a single wink of sleep?
54. If you could rewind time, where would you journey, who would you bring, and in which year?
55. Which celebrity do you think would be your best friend if given the chance?
56. What has been the most surprising turn of events in your life’s narrative?
57. Honestly, were you planning to reach out to me after this date?
58. How much social interaction feels excessive for you?
59. What’s your preferred mobile application?
60. Do you enjoy walking more, or do you prefer driving?



61. If you could choose to keep summer around all the time, would you do it?
62. What’s a guilty pleasure that you hide from others?
63. Is there a nickname that you truly dislike?
64. Which country do you feel compelled to visit, and which one would you avoid at all costs?
65. If you had the ability to speak any language fluently aside from English, which one would you select?
66. What’s the strangest altercation you’ve had with a sibling?
67. What was your most unforgettable summer experience?
68. Is there a common misconception people have about you?
69. What’s the most stunning view you’ve ever encountered?
70. Are you more of a solitary individual or do you thrive in group settings?
71. What’s your favorite ice cream flavor, and which one would you never want to try?
72. Are you someone who enjoys spontaneity? What’s the most impulsive act you’ve ever committed?
73. How proficient are you with technology?
74. In what ways have you evolved since your high school days?
75. What would your closest friend find most shocking about you?
76. Do you harbor any secrets?
77. Right at this moment, if you had the choice, where would you like to be?
78. Can you share the story of when you first met your best friend?
79. What was an insignificant decision that surprisingly altered your life’s course?
80. If given the chance, where would you relocate to, ensuring you have a fulfilling career and a comfortable lifestyle?
81. Do you have a quote or saying that you particularly cherish?
82. What’s the quirkiest talent you possess?
83. What’s the latest experience you’ve had for the first time?
84. If fame were to find you, what do you think it would be for?
85. Which would you prefer: being beautiful but lacking intelligence, or being average-looking yet highly intelligent?
86. How do you believe your parents would characterize you, and do you concur with their assessment?
87. What actions would you take if you stumbled upon a briefcase containing a million dollars?
88. If you had to pick one, would you choose skiing or swimming?
89. Who has been the most influential person in your life?
90. Aside from your job, where do you find yourself spending most of your time?
91. Are you more inclined to like cats or dogs?
92. Do you filter your phone calls?
93. In your opinion, what do you believe is the most vital aspect of a relationship?
94. What activities did you partake in during your last vacation?
95. When was the most recent occasion you walked for over an hour?
96. What’s a surprising talent you have that would astonish those who know you?
97. Who or what holds the greatest significance in your life?
98. Do you behave differently with acquaintances compared to close friends?
99. What skill would you love to acquire but haven’t yet?
100. Would you opt for invisibility or would you choose the ability to read minds?



101. How many nations have you traveled to?
102. If you could ask one question and get an answer immediately, what would that question be?
103. Would you say you have a lot of patience?
104. Are there any brands you despise so much that going bankrupt would be preferable to purchasing from them?
105. If you were to write a letter to your younger self, which age would you target and what would your message be?
106. What trend do you wish would come back into style?
107. What’s a fail-safe method to understand someone’s true character?
108. How long does it typically take for you to really know someone deeply?
109. Is there something currently happening that you think will seem amusing in two decades?
110. Is there something you’re excited about in the near future?



111. What are the top three social situations you tend to avoid at all costs?
112. Would you prefer having an incredibly fast vehicle or an ideal Wi-Fi connection?
113. What’s the one particular thing that genuinely excites you that most individuals don’t know about?
114. What’s the strangest nickname you’ve ever been given?
115. Have you ever experienced a truly disastrous double date?
116. Have you ever felt attracted to someone of the same gender?
117. What are your views on kissing during a first date?
118. Do you ever stress about conversation topics for a first date?
119. What’s the funniest lie you’ve ever told a partner in romance?
120. Do you prefer lasting love or fleeting passion?
See also: 12 Reasons Why A Coffee Date Is Actually The BEST First Date Idea
7 Topics To Stay Away From Discussing At All Costs
There are specific subjects that are best left untouched during a first date. These are significant red flags that your companion won’t appreciate. Steer clear of these discussions for now and concentrate on the topics previously mentioned.
Avoid conversations about religion



Introducing religion into a relationship is best left for later discussions. Since it’s a crucial aspect of a healthy partnership, it certainly deserves attention.
However, inaugural dates aren’t meant for such discussions.
Such topics can pave the way for uncomfortable exchanges that might be avoided. By all means inquire, but give it a few dates before doing so.
If there’s a genuine bond, conversations about faith may flow much more easily, benefiting you both.
The same applies to political subjects



Politics tends to be a topic I generally avoid, and it’s particularly inappropriate during the early phases of dating. What even is its relevance in the bigger picture?
Your focus should be on cherishing each other’s presence, nothing more.
The realities of political influence on our nation are beyond your control, so it’s wise to keep such discussions light.
Financial matters should remain off the table



This topic can feel a bit awkward, right? There are plenty of reasons for that.
At this juncture, you don’t yet know them or their family dynamics, which could lead to unintended insensitivity.
Once again, your safest strategy is to steer clear of financial discussions for now and let them surface organically as your relationship progresses.
When considering topics for a first date, just keep in mind… financial matters should be avoided.
Avoid discussing your ex-partner
When it comes to first dates, discussing past relationships is best avoided, particularly those that concluded on sour terms. You wouldn’t want your companion to perceive you as someone who harbors bitterness.
If your dating journey progresses, naturally, some details about previous connections will surface. However, for the initial encounter, keeping the conversation light and drama-free is advisable, despite any lingering animosity you might feel towards an ex.
**Avoid Discussing Intimacy Too Soon**
Determining the appropriate moment for intimacy is a deeply personal choice and varies for everyone.
In my opinion, raising such topics during a first date is a definite warning sign. Mentioning explicit subjects too early may lead to misunderstandings about your intentions and the nature of your interest.
Should you desire a deeper connection, it’s best to invest in emotional rapport and the overall atmosphere of your date rather than jumping straight into risqué discussions. Building that foundational connection will yield far better results when the relationship naturally progresses to more intimate territories.
**What You Seek in a Partner**
At this initial stage, you’re merely assessing if there’s potential for a relationship to blossom—not establishing a new romantic connection.
Your date likely has no desire to hear about your ideal partner’s characteristics just yet.
It’s important to approach this with authenticity and realism, acknowledging that everyone has imperfections. Expecting a prospective partner to fulfill every item on a list of ideal traits doesn’t reflect reality.
Understanding that all individuals have flaws is crucial, but it doesn’t diminish their value or potential fit in your life. Embrace others wholeheartedly for who they are without projecting superficial standards from the get-go.
Marriage (unless you want to push them away right away)



Discussions about marriage shouldn’t make an appearance on the early dates.
This subject is simply too significant and could lead them to misunderstand your intentions; moreover, it’s far too premature.
If your goal is to send your date running for cover, anxious that tying the knot is your only focus, be my guest.
However, for a chance at a real connection, I highly suggest steering clear of the marriage topic.
The initial date is meant for leisurely enjoyment and to learn about one another.
If the chemistry persists after a couple of dates, then you can begin to explore meaningful conversations gradually.
See also: 20 Incredible and Adorable Late-Night Date Suggestions for Every Couple
Closing Reflections



I have not only detailed what topics to address on a first date but also provided you with some intriguing and engaging questions to foster enjoyable conversations.
Additionally, ensure you heed the things to avoid discussing at this point. You don’t want to project the impression that you’re eager for a partner.
These valuable dating insights were gathered from my own dating experiences, filled with numerous highs and lows.
I became fatigued with online dating, constantly pondering the personas hiding behind the profiles.
First dates can be incredibly enjoyable if you approach them with a positive mindset and the right attitude.
The worst-case scenario is that you don’t connect, and you part ways. That’s all!
When you break it down, it’s not genuinely frightening. The first attempt at anything can feel overwhelming.
Just take a breath, revisit this advice as many times as necessary, and take your chance.
If a bond is established, the aforementioned essential guidelines will lead you to it (and make it enjoyable) in no time.
See also: 6 Aspects to Reflect on Before Going for the Second Date Kiss