Are You In A Forced Relationship? These 15 Signs Will Tell
It seems you’re afraid to face the future alone, so you stay in your relationship. You keep trying to make it work, essentially making it a forced relationship.
That doesn’t seem healthy, right? The emotional damage and mental strain make it even worse. This is why I wouldn’t recommend staying in such a relationship.
You might be wondering if they’re truly the one for you, or if you’re just forcing it. Here are some insights and signs to help you figure that out.
What Is A Forced Relationship?
Relationships can be tough to maintain, and sometimes it’s difficult to tell when a relationship is unhealthy or abusive.
So, what’s a forced relationship? It’s when one or both partners push the relationship forward, even when it’s really over.
Some emotionally abusive relationships are also seen as forced because the victim fears what might happen if they leave. People might stay in forced relationships for various reasons, such as:
• Fear of being alone and having no one to love or support them.
• Feeling unable to meet their partner’s expectations.
• Fear of judgment from others if they break up with their partner.
• Feeling responsible for their partner’s happiness.
• Fear of losing their social circle if they break up with their partner.
People in relationships can become complacent, often spending time with the wrong person and neglecting their own well-being. This leads to constant fights and walking on eggshells, resulting in unhappiness.
You might also find yourself in a forced marriage, trying to make it work and get it out of a rut. Forced relationships occur when two people who don’t want to be together are still compelled to stay together.
These relationships share a common theme: both partners don’t want to be in the relationship and would rather be on their own.
How To Tell If You’re In A Forced Relationship: 15 Signs
Are you wondering if you’re in a forced relationship? Here are some signs to look for:
1. You’re insecure
I’m not just talking about you, but your partner too. The relationship no longer feels conscious. In fact, you’re going through the motions.
The partner who wants out might feel like they’re not in control of their own life and that the other person is controlling them. They might also feel inadequate for their partner due to their insecurities.
2. No recovery after arguments
If you’re in a forced relationship, resolving issues with your partner is crucial. Relationships are delicate and can break easily. But no matter how much you fight, you can’t seem to recover.
It’s easy to get caught up in the heat of the moment and forget what you’re arguing about. Whether you’re arguing about small issues or bigger problems, this isn’t a sign of a healthy relationship.
3. They will change
You might hope that your partner will change in the future, but it’s important to be clear about what you want in a relationship.
The key to a successful relationship is open and honest communication with your partner. If you’re unhappy with the current state of your relationship, you need to talk about it. Waiting and hoping for your partner to change is the worst thing you can do.
4. Focus on the relationship
If you’ve been in a relationship for a while, you know it’s not always easy to focus on what’s important.
We’ve all been in relationships where we felt like we had to be constantly on guard to keep things going well. Relationships are fragile, and it’s hard to keep them strong.
5. Fake affection in public
It’s not that kind of relationship. Yes, they fake affection in public. When they’re home, they barely look at each other.
We understand the importance of showing love and affection. They might think that showing love and affection makes them seem vulnerable, which is common in forced relationships.
6. No trust
In any relationship, trust is the key factor. Without it, emotional security and intimacy can suffer.
Trust isn’t handed over; it’s earned. Hopefully, you’ve earned it in your relationship. Trust can be rebuilt through honesty, reliability, and consistency.
7. Pretending to care
Showing interest in your partner and making them feel loved is vital in a relationship. However, people in forced relationships might fake their interest to spare their partner’s feelings or avoid being alone.
The best way to overcome this is by genuinely taking an interest in their life. Try finding a balance, pursue new hobbies, and keep your relationship transparent.
8. Feeling unsafe
If you’re forcing your relationship, it might be because you feel unsafe. Let’s hope this isn’t due to emotional abuse or domestic violence.
Past experiences can make people fear being in a relationship. They might have been hurt or abused before, making it hard for them to open up and trust again.
9. The future looks dull
Relationships require mutual investment. If one partner isn’t excited about the other, it might not be the right fit.
Noticing when someone isn’t interested in you can be tough. If you’re unsure, look for signs they’re not excited to be around you.
If you’re feeling disinterested, consider if your partner feels the same. If they’re not excited to be around you, there might be a problem.
10. Not being friends
In romantic relationships, it’s possible you’re not friends with your partner. True love often starts with friendship, but you might be missing that vital “friends” part. Love and trust build relationships, while friendships are based on mutual interests.
Friendships can be temporary or lifelong, but relationships need long-term stability. Look for a friend in your lover first.
11. Occasional happiness
Sometimes you feel good about your relationship, other times you don’t. This is normal. Explore why your relationship doesn’t always feel great and find ways to enjoy it more.
Whether it’s a female-led relationship or a private one, the goal is to feel good about it. If you don’t, something might be wrong.
12. Lack of respect
Do you constantly seek respect that’s never given? This is common in relationships lacking respect. It can arise from jealousy, insecurity, or infidelity.
The first step to resolving this is to identify the cause of the disrespect. Once identified, work on the root issue and find solutions.
13. No shared goals
Another sign of a forced relationship is lacking shared goals. Setting common goals is crucial in any relationship.
Naturally, couples discuss their future together. If your partner avoids this, it might be time to leave. Staying in a relationship without future goals isn’t advisable.
14. Growing apart
Are you and your partner drifting apart? It’s not unusual for couples to grow apart in their relationships.
They might be bored or not receiving the same attention as before. This indicates a forced relationship that’s best ended.
15. Neglecting small gestures
Little things often make us happy. In relationships, small, effortless gestures mean a lot.
Small acts of kindness show how much you care. Faking these gestures can make it clear you’re forcing the relationship.
5 Reasons To Avoid A Forced Relationship
Relationships shouldn’t be forced. It’s crucial to respect each other’s feelings and give space when needed.
Everyone has their own vision of a perfect relationship, and that should be respected.
Here are some compelling reasons to avoid forcing your relationship:
• DIFFERENT: Admit it. You’ve grown apart. You’re chasing different dreams, and this relationship is holding you back.
• FULL-TIME EFFORT: Sure, relationships need work, but if you’re forcing it, it becomes a constant struggle.
• UNHAPPY: Both of you are likely unhappy. So why stay? Often, it’s just because it’s familiar.
• IT’S OBVIOUS: Your friends, family, and even social media followers can see it. You’re trying way too hard.
• MENTAL HEALTH: Yes, your emotional and mental well-being are taking a toll because you’re holding onto something that isn’t genuine.
There are countless reasons not to force a relationship that isn’t working. The most crucial one is that you’ll both end up hurting more if you stay in an unhappy situation too long.
Don’t Push It!
Ultimately, don’t force yourself to be with someone if your heart isn’t in it. It’s like repeatedly breaking your own heart.
Prioritize yourself and encourage your partner to express their feelings too. Really, the key message here is: don’t push it.
Your mental health, emotions, relationships, career, and even your physical health will suffer. So, pick yourself up and move forward with your life.
