7 Signs It’s ‘Love Bombing’ And Not Real Love
There’s a fragile distinction between love bombing and the heartfelt expressions of someone who truly loves you. This ambiguity makes it challenging to identify love bombing.
It often begins like a storybook romance, but it culminates in chaos.
One of the prevalent strategies employed by narcissists and sociopaths to draw you in, assert dominance, and retain control over their targets is love bombing.
While the indicators of love bombing can be subtle, they contrast with genuine displays of affection in specific aspects.
Love bombers tend to accelerate things too quickly
When everything seems too perfect, it’s often a warning sign that it isn’t.
If you encounter someone who’s eager to settle down, professes their love to you, and insists on you meeting their family after just a few dates, it typically indicates a red flag.
In a healthy partnership, connections take time to blossom. They evolve gradually, as you get to know one another better, build bonds, share experiences, and face challenges together.
If your partner is eager to rush through this phase, attempt to slow the pace. If unable to do so, it’s a reason for concern.
They will excessively compliment you
He is likely to tell you how attractive, intelligent, charming, and beautiful you are, often to an excessive degree. He will seize every opportunity to glorify your very being.
When apart, expect frequent texts expressing that he misses you. He will share photos, songs, and sentimental messages on social media very soon into your relationship.
If his praise feels overblown and starts to make you uneasy, there could be an issue. While genuine compliments are delightful, they can become problematic if they seem excessive, especially if you haven’t shared many deep interactions together.
This should be a point of caution.
Related: Love Bombing Vs. Infatuation: 14 Essential Distinctions
They will inundate you with presents
Whenever you meet him, he presents you with something. It could be flowers, chocolates, or even pricier items. He seems determined to win your affection every moment he can.
While occasional presents are fine, is it really necessary for him to give something each time you meet?
Love bombers have an uncanny knack for timing their words perfectly
Generally, men and women differ in understanding and their communication might not always align. However, love bombers excel at hitting the mark consistently.
They know how to articulate just what you want to hear—not because of genuine concern but because they’re often quite clever, manipulating your vulnerabilities for their gain.
When you confide in them about matters that trouble you, your feelings, or your past mistakes, they pay close attention.
Every word you say is noted for potential future use against you.
Related: The Unpleasant Reality of Experiencing Love Bombing Followed by Abrupt Ghosting
They create an illusion of familiarity between you
From the outset, they might start proclaiming that you are destined to be together, soulmate vibes, and an unparalleled connection that no one else shares. But do you genuinely know this person?
Reflect on this: what has he opened up about—his life, history, and family? If it seems like the dialogue is one-sided, with you doing all of the sharing while he excessively praises you, it’s possible he is sidestepping discussions about his own life. Experiencing a spark or chemistry in the early stages is very common. Nonetheless, it’s vital to approach this with realism and assess whether you truly understand him or if he has you caught up in an illusion.
They dislike being interrogated
If you start probing with inquiries like, “How can you be certain you love me?” or “What leads you to think we are soulmates?”, he could become defensive and not respond well to those questions. He may exhibit annoyance or frustration, as such confrontations are likely foreign to him. This is an entirely new experience for someone unaccustomed to having his statements and behaviors scrutinized. This situation might reveal that he doesn’t have all the answers that he usually boasts about. Also, these insightful questions can help judge his reactions.
They exhibit jealousy over trivial matters
Consider a scenario where you’re going out with friends for the first time since starting your relationship. While there is nothing inherently wrong with this, he might stir feelings of guilt. His comments could include things like, “I thought we had plans tonight?” or “Are you seriously leaving me on my own?”. He might even say, “Will you miss me?”.
With this kind of rhetoric, he’s trying to make you feel guilty for wanting to go out, and should you choose to go, you might still feel a sense of unease knowing he’s home feeling lonely. He might resort to various forms of jealousy. Whatever the case, consider this a warning sign that you shouldn’t overlook.
Navigating the complexities of someone’s affection can be challenging. Sometimes, it’s difficult to discern if they are genuinely invested in your happiness or if they have ulterior motives, potentially love bombing as part of a hidden agenda.
The initial phase of a relationship is crucial for those who seek to manipulate. This is the time they cultivate a bond that may confuse and draw you in, which can obscure their changing behaviors later on. You might find yourself rationalizing shifts in his attitude, hoping they will revert to the charming person you initially met, so be vigilant about love bombing behaviors.
Recognizing the signs of love bombing is essential to guard yourself against it. Trust your instincts if something feels off; your gut feeling should guide you. If you find yourself in a situation that feels wrong, don’t hesitate to step away.
