What A Casual Relationship Is And 12 Rules For Being In One

The phenomenon of casual relationships, also known as casual dating, has surged in popularity recently. Could it stem from our fast-paced lifestyles or our habit of catching flights instead of feelings?

While we may never have a definitive answer, sometimes embracing a casual approach is precisely what we need!

Defining a casual relationship

Essentially, a casual relationship indicates that you have no interest in getting married (at least for now).

It also suggests that you’re not aiming for a serious long-term commitment; rather, you’re focused on having fun without any emotional ties.

Just as it takes two to engage in a tango, it takes two to navigate a casual relationship successfully.

If one partner starts developing deeper feelings, then the casual arrangement can quickly become complicated.

When only one party desires a committed relationship, your lighthearted chapter can turn into a challenging scenario (especially if you’re not ready for seriousness).

This is why it’s vital to set some casual relationship guidelines that help safeguard both you and your casual partner from emotional pain!

12 Essential Rules for Casual Relationships

Clarify that you’re seeking something non-serious

The most crucial element of maintaining a casual relationship is to clearly communicate your intentions to your potential partner. However, don’t misinterpret this.

You don’t have to disclose everything right on your first encounter. You could bring it up the next time you meet or whenever you feel it’s the right moment.

By expressing that you’re not seeking anything serious, you allow them to contemplate their desires.

You might say something like: “I genuinely enjoy spending time with you, but I want you to understand that I’m not looking for anything serious right now.”

If they respond positively and share your perspective, congratulations: Your casual adventure is about to kick off!

Keep in mind that respect is integral to casual relationships

No matter if you’re in a non-exclusive arrangement, a casual fling, or something laid-back, mutual respect is essential.

Even if you’re not in a committed partnership and lack a public declaration of your relationship status, that person deserves respect.

Just like you, they are a person and should be afforded the same level of respect and kindness.

Pursue what brings you joy

To reiterate, what defines casual relationships? They are relationships that lack conditions and embody ‘no strings attached’.

Another way to define a casual relationship is: Do whatever you feel like!

In this type of relationship, there is no need to stress about compromises, their availability, or going above and beyond to fulfill their demands.

In fact, you can abandon the worries of first date inquiries or the pressure to leave a lasting first impression.

You have complete FREEDOM!

and free to pursue anything your heart truly wishes.

(This is one reason why this kind of relationship suits college students wonderfully.)

A safety net is an option (if desired)

A casual relationship allows you the freedom to maintain a backup (or multiple backups) if that’s what you desire.

You may date one individual at a time or keep an active dating life and connect with several people simultaneously.

I’ll say it once more. You have the liberty to follow your heart without the burden of conforming to traditional dating or relationship expectations.

In essence, there’s no need to conform to societal norms; do what YOU want, and that’s the charm of a casual connection.

However, just be careful not to develop feelings (which can be surprisingly tricky).

No feelings of jealousy or possessiveness permitted

Jealousy acts as a significant destroyer not just of serious relationships but of all types of connections, including casual ones.

Avoid feeling bitter about one-night encounters or your partner’s meetings with other individuals.

Should you discover through social media that your casual partner is seeing others, don’t react negatively or express anger.

Jealousy is often the first indication that a casual arrangement is evolving into something more serious.

If you sense possessiveness in your partner, recognize that it’s a major warning sign, and think about terminating the arrangement before it escalates.

Also check out: The Comprehensive Guide on Avoiding Emotional Attachments.

Redirect your focus to other life aspects

Being committed to a serious relationship demands substantial time, commitment, and energy.

Fortunately for you, you aren’t tied down right now, allowing you to concentrate on other areas of your life!

Devote time to enhancing your mental well-being and physical health, and cherish moments spent with friends and loved ones.

Try something novel, venture into new experiences, and step outside your usual confines!

By directing your energy toward different aspects of life, you’ll also help prevent forming an emotional bond with your casual partner due to the limited time spent together.

You already know the pattern. When boredom or loneliness strikes, it’s natural to reach out to that one individual you’re seeing and suggest a meetup.

While this is fine occasionally, it shouldn’t become a habitual occurrence.

Avoid making plans too soon

Imagine planning a casual hangout on a Friday evening.

In that scenario, making arrangements a week ahead is not ideal, but it’s perfectly fine to do it a day or two before the actual hangout.

The rationale behind this is that it allows you to cherish the present and concentrate on other aspects of your life (as previously discussed).

What happens if you encounter someone new in that timeframe?

If your concentration is solely on planning future encounters with your casual partner, you’d be channeling your thoughts and emotions into that, which implies seriousness.

Instead, prioritize the immediate situations around you and contemplate personal growth and self-improvement.

Avoid excessive communication between meet-ups

Every relationship specialist advises that excessive time spent with someone may lead to developing deeper feelings or attachments.

The same principle applies to messaging or calling them between your in-person interactions.

Don’t bombard them with endless texts or pictures throughout the day. Avoid constant phone calls and definitely refrain from that.

Keep in mind, the more shared experiences you have with your casual partner, the more intimacy you’ll cultivate.

Thus, it’s wiser to keep your interactions minimal.

If you find yourself compelled to share every minute detail of your day with them, you might be nearing a critical point, as this is a hint that things might be getting serious.

Refrain from inviting them to family gatherings or friend outings

Considering bringing your casual partner to meet your family? Pause and think. By doing so, they could mistakenly believe that you are in or about to enter a serious relationship.

It’s not ideal for them to become emotionally attached to someone who may only be in their life temporarily.

Moreover, there’s no need for external influence or pressure regarding your romantic situation.

This same guideline should apply to your social outings with friends.

If you introduce your casual partner to your friend circle, they will eventually become a recognized part of your group, limiting your freedom.

Your friends will turn into their friends, which negates the casual nature entirely.

Therefore, keeping the relationship discreet—perhaps only sharing it with a few close friends—is the most prudent choice, without formal introductions (even if they express strong desires to meet).

Avoid requesting personal favors from them

And don’t even think about asking them for personal favors! Do you need somebody to lend a hand with your chores, job, or any other duties?

Refrain from requesting assistance from your casual partner for these matters.

Honestly, avoid doing that. Regardless of how urgent or overwhelming your situation is, it’s never advisable to seek their help.

Why? Because you shouldn’t assume they will always be available when you require support.

This is not how casual dating or open relationships function.

If you do reach out, it’s likely they will expect you to return the favor in some manner, and just like that: you risk transforming a casual relationship into something more serious.

Don’t overanalyze situations

“Should I reach out now or later? What should I wear? What if I accidentally say something wrong and scare them off? Is this just a casual affair or are we friends with benefits?”

Overthinking can result in hurt feelings. Overthinking can create stressful situations.

You don’t need either of these experiences in your life if you choose to engage in casual relationships.

The decision is yours. If you commit to not overthinking things and to follow these guidelines, you’ll become skilled at casual dating.

However, if you begin to scrutinize every action of yours and your partner’s, you won’t appreciate the experience of being casual and will likely feel discontent.

Be truthful with yourself and your casual partner!

Wondering how to maintain a casual relationship without getting hurt? It’s simple: just be candid with yourself and your casual partner.

Engage in a discussion regarding exclusivity with them.

If you find yourself developing romantic feelings and contemplating a more committed relationship, you should communicate that to them.

Or if you choose to end the relationship, be upfront about your lack of interest in continuing it.

I once caught feelings for a casual partner, and I was extremely nervous about how to handle the situation.

After some reflection on the pros and cons, I opted to end things, and I can confirm it was the right choice since I wasn’t prepared for a serious commitment at that moment.

See also: From Friends To Lovers: 11 Steps For Transitioning To The Next Level

Embrace the experience!

While navigating a casual relationship, the last thing you want is to overanalyze events or get emotionally hurt.

For this reason, adhere to the rules mentioned above and everything should unfold smoothly. Additionally, remember to relish the experience!

A casual relationship ought to be filled with joy and positive energy.

If you find that it’s causing you anxiety or stress in any form, contemplate walking away because you deserve more than lackluster casual romances!